Come see my cage built in my grave

I have this fear that I might not be capable of real love. It may just be because I've never come close to feeling true love for another person other than the love that I have for my family and friends. Or it might be that I have no idea what love is supposed to feel like. Do you know when you're in love? Can you feel it? What does it feel like? I want to feel that. I want to be so passionate about someone that I want to be with them all the time and go out of my way to make them happy. Why haven't I felt that? I've been with someone who made me their number one priority....but why couldn't I return it?

I have this nasty habit of suppressing my emotions and feelings, even my thoughts. I can't seem to express them properly and most of the time I don't want to express them at all. Most of the time my not so pleasant emotions are quite content with just sitting in their cage in the grave that is my brain.

Most of the time....but not always.

Writing used to be my outlet for my suppression. I used to be able to dig up that grave and unlock that cage and put all that shit into stories and poems and what not. But for some odd reason, it stopped working. I would dig up the grave but would lose the key to that fucking cage. So I would sit and stare all of my emotions in the face, but couldn't reach them. Lately though I've had a huge need to write. To just get my thoughts out of my head and put them down on paper....or in a blog....and I am finally able to sit down and do it.

But I don't know what to say. Where is my fucking key?!

questions

How do you diagnose a pathological liar?

How do you treat a person who suppresses their emotions?

How do you fix shyness?

Why do boys think differently than girls?